For starters, this is NOT an “I am so depressed that you should be concerned about me” blog post. Far from it. This is a post making an observation about the way I feel sometimes.
It’s a feeling that I know others can relate to because some of you are my readers…
Now, there are a lot of things I enjoy about being a single and a single dad
-A rotating schedule with the kids and the ability to see them often; have time together with just them, and our summer vacations together
-I have my own house
-I have freedom to come and go
-I don’t report to anyone
-I have alone time
Like most things, there’s an upside and a downside. I’ve mentioned some of the upside. Now for the downside. There are times I get lonely.
This weekend is one of those times. I work on Saturday and Sunday, so I am not alone all the time. I don’t have my kids this weekend, but have no plans either.
I belong to some singles groups (DayHikers, Culinary Extroverts, Singles Soiree, Harrisburg Social Club), but there are no events going on tonight or Sunday. Some friends are on vacation, but those friends are either married or away with their kids. I am not seeing anyone, so there is no one special in my life right now.
There is a large fireworks display outside of Reading, PA that I was originally looking forward to. I asked someone to go and they appreciated the offer, but cannot attend. My kids have plans and just spend 9 days with Dad on vacation. I don’t want to go myself so….
There is a singles dance tonight, but most attending are older than I am so…
I will probably clean out my car, start some painting at home, ride my bike and everything will be fine.
But I get lonely. I never walk alone. God is there to comfort me when feeling this way. I know I have two great kids, some good friends, a nice place….etc. But, I still get lonely. These are the times when I ask myself if there will ever be someone special that I can share my life with again. And then it passes and I am fine.
Surprisingly, I am human after all (that was a joke) and know that if I am patient, be true to myself, don’t shut out my friends, work hard and keep the faith that one day I won’t feel lonely again.